Visiting Jasmine

I got the ferry over to Sydney city centre this evening to meet up with Jasmine. I have only met Jasmine three times and always fleetingly but whenever we are together we get on so well. We're very similar in personality and interests so even though I really hardly know her we never have any trouble chatting or finding things to do.

I owed Jasmine big time as I stayed with her for three days last time I was in Sydney, just after I cut my foot open in the shipwreck. I must have been such a pain as Jasmine had planned a few days of trail running, paddle boarding and cycling. I, unfortunately was only fit to sit on the sofa. But Jasmine and her family made me feel so at home and I had a wonderful time with them all.

I started of repaying her by being half hour late and soaked with sweat.

I didn't realise the CBD bus only ran until 3pm so I sat at the bus stop for half hour before setting off on foot. I also didn't realise how vast Sydney is. After 40 minuets of brisk walking I was only half way there so I jumped on a train then still had a twenty minuet walk the other side. Ten minuets if I hadn't have gone the wrong way out of the station.

Luckily she hadn't left and was still pleased to see me. We went for dinner and some drinks and were joined by her friend who was visiting home during her working holiday in London. 

I gave Jasmine her, rather tenuous present. She had mentioned in passing last time we met -over a year ago- that she really wanted a Swiss Army knife. So I picked one up for her. It was well received but I don't think she actually remembered actually wanting one.

We had a really great catch up and I worked hard on trying to persuade her to come to the UK for a working holiday.

Wish park re-united

After bidding farewell to Charlie and her housemates (both conveniently named Sam). They dropped me at the airport for my flight to Sydney.

I arrived in sunny Sydney and got back into my normal traveling routine... Making poor decisions and taking ages to get anywhere! I missed my bus as I was trying to be a cheap ass and get one from outside the airport before realising that would mean I had to walk down a three lane motorway for an hour with my full pack on. So I waited half hour got the right bus (on the third attempt as I just kept getting on every bus that showed up. Then met an Indian guy named Sebastian who was also transferring at the local train station to get to circular quay. Due to me facing about getting a ticket at the wrong terminal I missed my ferry too. So I sat and listened to a busking swing band under the Sydney harbour bridge for half hour. Eventually I got on the ferry and sailed around the well lit opera house to Manly.

After grabbing a cheeky pie I met JJ my old school friend on the corso. It was great to see him again. He's got a pretty cool job coaching Sydney FC youngsters and is contracted to AS Roma for scouting purposes.

We went to a huge open air pub. It was a massive culture shock for me after being in New Zealand for nearly a year. Going from no young people and dancing on a Friday night with a crowd of four people to a Sunday night with a good few hundred 18-30 in this pub alone!

We had a good catch up that evening and the next morning I went surfing at Manly Beach.

JJ's board was pretty huge but I still did pretty well. I managed to catch a couple of green waves and rode them all the way in to shore. The unfortunate thing was I didn't put any suncream on the backs of my thighs. So my arse was to be red raw for the rest of my trip!

That evening, when JJ got back from work, we went to get some food from the big open air pub again. JJ and I split a burger and salmon making ourselves a very unusual surf n turf!

We then played a couple of games of pool at the harbour side before heading home.

On my final day in Manly I wanted to go surfing again, but my thighs just wouldn't take it! So I decided to go for the scene walk way. After walking only about 20 minuets I found a nice tree and had a nap until it was time to go into Sydney and meet my friend Jasmine.

Charlie Brown

Today I caught the ferry across Auckland harbour to meet Charlie. Charlie and I met in Thailand and traveled together two weeks there before a month or so in New Zealand.

We had a really great few days together. We went on a hike up the island volcano of Rangitoto. Just like every other time Charlie and I have traveled together it was grey wet and miserable weather. We still had a lot of fun scrambling up past the lava fields and enjoying the limited view from the volcanoes summit.

We also had a really fun evening game of glo-put. An indoor crazy golf course all under only black lights with balls, clubs and scenery all done up in uv. It was really cool and a lot of fun. We then had some Thai food for dinner at a local restraunt.

Surfing NZ

Today I went over to Muriwai beach in west Auckland for a surfing lesson. I got the bus over and paid extra for a pick up from the bus stop to the beach.

After a heavily unsuccessful surf clas where I was relegated to the baby board and couldn't stand up for shit I arranged my ride back to the bus stop for 3:30 for the last bus.

After the class I joined a couple of air New Zealand pilots for a sandwich and a beer before returning to the beach for a little hike and a visit to a huge blue gannet colony. One of the bastards managed to shit inside my book!

I then returned to the surf shop where the owner ignored me then went on the phone until ten minuets before my bus left. He then came out with a stream of crap excuses why he couldn't take me. His noble solution was to make me a sign and let me hitchhike back to the city.

Luckily I approached some other surfers who had rented from his shop and they kindly gave me a ride to a shopping complex where I could get another bus into town.

I got back just in time to pick up some fish from the harbour market for dinner.

On the road again

So Liv dropped me on highway six. I didn't have to wait too long before a nice family picked me up and took me to Blenhiem. From there I hitched another ride to the port town of Picton.

I dropped off my bags and went for my last trail run in the Marlborough sounds, and in New Zealand. It was a good run. Pretty steep and challenging in places, with some great views too.

That night I realised I have become the weird guy in the hostel. I was knackered so I went to bed pretty early. I was woken in the middle of the night by my dorm mates. It transpired, however, that I had been woken in rem sleep. I was completely paralysed. They could see my eyes open when they turned on the light. But I physically couldn't move! They kept talking to me and I wanted to join in. Eventually I managed to get out a long pained groan. They stopped talking to me after that. I'm not sure why. 

The next day I hiked over to the ferry and got my ship over to Wellington. I met a nice lady on the ferry off to visit her son in London.

As soon as I got to Wellington I joined up with a young girl also toteing a large backpack and we got the bus to the airport. She was a Canadian, studying in oz and was back off over the Tasman. I flew up to auckland. After a long bus journey I arrived at my friend from uni Chris' place where I was to stay for four nights. 

We went to a pub quiz on Tuesday and I cooked us a fish supper on Wednesday. Apart from that I spent most of my time getting free trials at Auckland gyms doing exercise classes.

Last week in Nelson

On Saturday we had our works Christmas party. 

Simon, Milly and I drove out to upper Moutre to meet everyone else; Jo, Margreet, Andrew, Candace, Alan and their children Zack and Ben.

We exchanged the car for a ride in the tralor into their farm.

We went Clay pidgeon shooting!

It was really good fun. I came third. Behind Simon and Phil, who are seasoned shooters. It was very funny as Margreet kept forgetting to point the gun down when she wasn't shooting. Scaring the crap out of Simon, who she kept pointing the gun at!

We also got to have a run about in their dune buggy. I took Zack, Alan and Candace's eldest son out. He's not much into danger and speed, so he didn't ask to go out with me again!

After the fun we had a nice BBQ. Jo and Candace had a go on the Guitar and we had a bit of a sing song.

On Monday we had a Physio only do. We ordered take away Indian and got a box of beers in. We turned the gym and a Physio bed into a buffet hall and ate sooooo much!

On Tuesday Tim and Suze went out wind surfing with me. It turns out wind surfing is not like riding a bike. 

I hopped on the board and straight away sailed across the harbour, no worries. Then it was time to tack. SPLOSH! No chance. Could I go the other direction? Could I balls. I spent twenty minuets getting up and then falling in. Eventually the time pulled me around the boulder bank and dragged me out to sea. So the life guard had to come out in the boat and rescue me.

Tim drove out after another twenty minuets of falling in and gave me some tips. Finally I was wishing around on the water!

Liv and I went out for Thai on the Wednesday.

Thursday was my final Judo session. I have always struggled with stand up fighting. However on this, my final session after seven months it clicked into place and I fought pretty well.

Friday was my leaving do. It was absoloutly perfect, I had a great time. All my favourite people came to the local craft beer pub and everyone mixed in and got on really well. We had a great laugh. At about 11 we were all heading home. When I was collared by Jeremy; my best friend in Nelson. "Gary, I've got two young kids. Alyssia has given me a free night tonight to send you off. I've not been out at night with the boys for three years. We're sure as hell not going home now!" How can you turn that down!

Unfortunately, Jeremy was a very excitable drinker... We had three pints and two shots in aroun twenty minuets. 

We then headed to the local nightclub, which being Nelson had five people in it, and dropped the dance moves!

Saturday was a hangover day for me. I just cycled over to Livs house and had some lunch. Then we both went to Simons and met Milly and drove down to Cable Bay. My favourite spot in Nelson. We had a BBQ with the fish simon had caught that day.

On the drive home we had an impromptu accapella sing song to build me up buttercup and some John Legond. It was a really fun evening, we followed up with a couple of beers at Simons.

And that brings us to Sunday! My final day.

I packed up my things, said my goodbye to Ben, my housemate, then off to Simons to say goodbye to the guys. After an hour or so Liv dropped me on the road out of town and I stuck my thumb out and waited for a ride to the next chapter of my life.

A weekend at sea

This weekend I turned nautical.

I rose early on Saturday morning to go to the boat house with Ben to pick up a couple of sea kayaks. We had a bit of a pulava with getting them out of the shed and into the borrowed estate car we had borrowed from Bens friend. This was because someone had moved a load of furniture infront of the door. Also because one of the kayaks was full of water from its last outing.

Anyway we got the kayaks and picked up some bait -frozen squid I sat on whilst driving to defrost the squid and frost bite my gentlemans quatres- and arrived to meet Simon at Glenduan.

We set off kayak fishing.

It was a beautiful setting in the ever calm Tasman sea, ringed in by mountains. 

I caught sod all.

Simon caught a sand shark and tossed it to me, still alive, to fillet for fresh bait.

I tried to kill the small shark humanely. I placed the tip of my blade at the base of its skull and hit the butt of the knife with the heel of my hand. Still the shark flapped and squirmed. I flipped him over and did the same on the other site. This time through his thought rather than spinal cord. With another thump and a 5 minuet wait he was still flapping around in frenzy. So I proceeded to continue my hole and cut half his head off. 

Still he twisted and flapped.

I gutted him and removed one fillet from his rugged back, I was able to easily control him now. The trashing had stopped so I took a good look at this sand paper covered mini shark. What sharp teeth he had. I wonder what they feel like...

The shark with no internal organs, head half removed, and stripped on one side, who's blood filled my kayak; bit me!

This was not the only fun we had. After I had jutted the shark and used him for fresh bait we spotted a pod of killer whales around 200 meters away, then 50 meters away, then 10 Meyers away from Simons kayak. He shit himself. But they didn't come any closer.

We returned to shore after nearly four hours at sea with nothing more than the flesh of a zombie sand shark.

Ben and I are greeted by a spindley thin man with a clipboard and binoculars; Simon decided to stay out fishing for an hour more. The man worked for the department of conservation. Someone had called him saying we had been fishing in the marine reserve, which we hadn't. Before I could try and chat our way out of it Ben kicked off. Shouting and swearing. It didn't get us anywhere, obviously. Eventually I gave him a couple of fake names and addresses and we went on our way.

After dropping off the kayaks at the boat house and having a shower I met up with Simon again and we went and picked up Olivia, another friend from work and we went to play frisbee golf. I had instructed Liv to buy the cheapest frisbees. They were beyond shite... The smaller one needed no technique, just pretend your hurling a wet paper plate and you've got the technique. Simon had bought a fancy one so we rotated between us, whoever won got to use the good disc on the next hole. It was really good fun and surprisingly compettative. With the last hole deciding who buys the ice creams, I enjoyed a lovley banana-choc on Simon. Moral of the story, never share your kit.

We then went down to the beach and played mini golf. I won again with a hole in one on the final hole!

We had a cider in a craft beer pub near by before heading home.

The next day, Sunday I started off at 6am watching the England v All Blacks game. What a tight one, I lost the money I had bet on England to win by three points!

As soon as the final whistle blew I shot off to the port just in time for Waka paddling. I went out with a novice crew paddling on Maori outrigger canoes. It was really good fun I was the 'engine room' at third seat and really enjoyed being chosen to call the 'hup' every 13 strokes when we needed to change sides.

After a good hour of paddling we got back to the port. Just in time for me to run down the waterfront to jetty B where Suze, a fellow Physio from work, had roped me in to help sail a yaught with her. By help I mean make tea and act as a ballast for any tight cornering we had to do. 

It was great fun on the open sea. Suze, Judith, Geoff and I ended coming in fourth after handicap in the 5 hour race which we were delighted with. We had a lot of fun listening to Van Morrison and at one point I got very confused as Judith -although I later found out was talking to Geoff- looked straight at me with her Sunneys on and asked me to lift her up. I was perplexed. She then added, "yes could you just lift me up and switch the gas?" I thought why doesn't she just lift her own bum cheek the lazy cow? I asked her how I should lift her and we all laughed for quite some time. My other colleagues also got a laugh when Suze told everyone on Monday morning!

After a quick BBQ back at the yaught club I gave my car a quick wash to help it sell and retired home for a well earned rest after a very busy weekend!

Nelson lakes

My first weekend of freedom for two months! 

The makos U19 season has finished so I was super keen to make the most of the sunny weekend and get outdoors! 

My car wasn't so keen!

My battery, I later found out, had a charge of 70 rather than 300 like it is supposed to! But dammit I wanted a weekend away! So we set off anyway -in total I had 7 jump starts from strangers this weekend-.

I woke up early on Saturday morning and picked up Stephanie to go to Lake Chalace, in the mount Richmond national park. We got ourselves and bikes into the car and after a short consultation with the map decided to go in completely the opposite direction and go to Lake Rotoiti instead!

What a fantastic idea that was. What a wonderful part of the world we had traveled to. A glassy, clear glacial lake surrounded by lush green woodland backed by distant snow peaked mountains. The stuff dreams are made of.

This was Stephanie's first experiance hiking, or apparently being even close to a tree. So it took some time to repack her bag. Taking out the hair dryer and six clothing options for the next day that she wanted me to carry for 10km each day.

So we were off! 

After ten minuets or so we were trapped between the lake and the dense undergrowth as I had tried to find us a more scenic route lakeside. After finding a rugged wooded corridor to traverse to return us to the track I was absorbed by a sour marsh. I put my foot in to a bog patch nearly up to my knee and was no where near the bottom. Somehow I managed to stop the sink and not plummet in face first but relieve my foot from the peutrid mud. After a quick dip in the lake I resigned to slop on with a sopping wet shoe for the rest of the day.

After an hour or so's ramble through the tranquil lakeside trees, traversing the occasional stream, we stopped for a lunch break on a small secluded pebble beach.

As a relief from the sand fly bites we took a dip to protect our legs! 

Glacier lakes are very, very cold...

Just before sunset we arrived at lake end hut. A delightful little wooden cabin where we would be spending the night.

I did the manly thing and built and tended to the fire. Even if one of the other hikers did join in right at the end to steal all of my manly glory!

I stocked the fire well just before we went to sleep. A little too well as in an hours time it was so swelteringly hot in the little hut I had to shed my sleeping bag and shirt!

We hiked back, enjoying the sunshine, the next day after a leasurely wake up. 

Feeling a bit sweaty and grotty when we arrived back to the car park so I took a full dunk in the lake. I couldn't tempt Stephanie in this time though! 

When we arrived back the car battery was flat again... I went off chasing cars to eventually come back with a very pleasant old couple who gave us a jump.

We then drove over to Blenheim to watch the rugby after a short chill by the river. Stephanie didn't fancy the game so I went on my own.

It was a good game but unfortunately the Tasman Makos ended up loosing so we drove back just in time to bid farewell to Anja, our friend from the hostel, at her leaving party.

Fins up for the Makos!

The last two months have been pretty dominated by work as it's the ITM Cup season. Or the NZ premiership. I've been working with the Tasman Makos under 19s team which has been a lot of fun.

We spent six weeks playing friendlies and pool games, traveling all over the south island to play. My favourite was playing against the Canterbury Maori in Kaikora. They did an awesome Haka to start the game off. And we won, which is always pretty nice.

The season culminated in a week long trip to Taupo, on the north island. We played three games and managed to lose one, playing into 60kmph winds in the second half. We won one against a South Auckland team and then drew with Auckland B team.

We had a lot of fun on the trip, I went on a couple of runs, watched some good, fast, running rugby and made a lot of friends who I hope make it into super XV jerseys in the future.

Mount Arthur

What a fantastic adventure!

I got up at 6am on Sunday morning to drive to the base of Mount Arthur; 1786m of mountain. I drove for an hour and a half into the rugged and untouched Kahurangi national park. My drive was made more enjoyable as around each corner I could see the pinks, purples, reds and blues of a spectacular sunrise bro help me start my adventure.

Off out of the car I went and with M people greatest hits in my headphones off I went on my snowy winter land walk. The first hour and a half was through snow clad trees, knitting together above me creating a Narnia environment. I got caught in the moment and tried to make friends with a snow duck (probably not its real name) and it bit my finger!

Then I got to the Hut before the real hike started and sat down for a nice sandwich.

Then off I went with two doctors from the hospital I had met at the hut. I felt more than a little underprepared, hiking through the knee deep snow in trainers with nothing but a bottle of fanta. They had ice axes, fancy boots, crampons the works! 

At one point I dropped hip deep in the snow like the vicar of dibbley. I also slipped on the ice a couple of times rather comically.

The views were out of this world. I can't begin to do them justice with descriptions. The pictures below are ace, but do not give anywhere near an accurate representation of how amazing it was. Snow capped peaks around me giving way to lush dense mountainous hillsides with the turquoise blue Tasman sea nestled in the arms of the golden bay. The distant city of Nelson just visible sitting between the farther, distant mountains and the calm sea.

As I looked up the vivid blue of the sky changes, it deapens. It's not a darkness you associate with bat weather but more like a denser blue. Like a small bit of midnight sky trying to breakthrough to the day.

The final 300 meters were pretty intense. Scrambling along steep hill sides, kicking into the deep snow making foot holds to stop me slipping 20-30 foot down the snow bank. Approaching the summit was a 20 meter sheer climb in the arctic conditions. Kicking and punching into the snow I lead the boys up the snowy cliff. Heaving myself up onto the ledge we had a short walk to the cloudy peak where we enjoyed a cup of hot chocolate for our efforts.

That evening I spent 3 hours in the hot tub trying to nurse my tired legs. The beers were important also...

Being an animal and seeing the animals

Last week I went out for my friend Mike's 30th birthday. 

It was a 'shit shirt' theme. So I went in my best 14 year old boys comic book pyjama shirt. We played a few drinking games and had a good old dance. I think we dominated the dance floor because of our awesome moves that no one else could compete with. Rather than being weird, shit and terrifying.

Nick, Liv and I went to the night club (little rock) and continued to do shots for about an hour before taking on their dance floor. We very soon had a very roomy section to move for some unknown reason. Then on kicking out time we decided to jump in a strangers car. Who had clearly come to pick up their daughter.

We hopped in and politely asked; "so, where are we off to?" There was a lot of screaming. Apparently two males in their late twenties getting in the back of your car and asking you to drive can be quite traumatic. Even if we were both dressed like Noel Edmonds.

Eventually we got out and the screaming subsided. They then shouted out their window that we were idiots and could have been driven off and raped and killed. I responded with the only natural answer to that theory. I pulled my top up, rubbed my nipple biting my other finger and said to the huge middle aged Maori woman "well maybe you should have done. I'm sure we would have both liked it..." Before we ran away laughing.

I then gate crashed my neighbours house keeping them up till 6 in the morning talking shit.

On Friday this week Dave and I went to nature land zoo. We wanted to see the oldest reptile species in the world. It also has three eyes. Unfortunatly it was hibernating.

We still had a good time. Whilst we were in the avery I got talking to a keeper who showed us round. We got to talk to a parrot, have another parrot on our shoulder and hold two of the Australian lizards. Pretty cool all in all.

Saturday night I went and watched an English folk band in a Mongolian Yurk with my French friend Coliene. 

I also got the job as under 19s Physio for the Tasman Mako's Physio this week

Good times, flying by

I've settled down in Nelson really well. The last month has flown by.

I've been doing exciting things most days but it's hard to report on them when your living a (moderately) normal life.

So here is a smattering of anecdotes and what I've been up to.

Firstly on the rugby front I've done my initiation. I took it like a little girl! 

The initiation was to eat a spoon of cinnamon. You may be thinking the same as me; what a piece of piss! I've done much worse, this is neither degrading, disgusting or physically dangerous.

Incorrect.

I strutted up to the back of the bus on the way back from Blenham. I'd just finished eating a mc-ice cream and I'm not going to lie, I was feeling pretty confident I was going to look pretty hard in a few moments time. As I took the heaped tablespoon, amid the jeers, lads were shouting at me to chew it. I've been around rugby lads for a while. Hey, I am a rugby lad. So I assumed they were trying to screw me over for their amusement. So I tried to swallow the whole heap in one go.

The powder congealed in my throat instantly. I coughed and blew it out of my nose. Then the bike came, ah what a lovely taste! As I choked, puffing orange smoke like an asthmatic dragon I threw up and swallowed it. Then I sucked myself tall, tears in my eyes and swallowed the whole lot (again). 

Somehow I had managed to fully line my sinuses with cinnamon. I had to sit quietly full two hours blowing reddy brown grunge out of my nose! 

Then I had a bad sinus headache the whole next day. So I spent my only day off in bed achey while Jack enjoyed rabbit island and ultimate frisbee on the beach.

To make matters worse the Jackson uploaded a video of the sorry attempt so all the lads who weren't there could bully me too.

The other two new guys chewed it like they were told and ate it with no more than a hiccup!

I also went paddle boarding with a friend from work. It was great fun. I took to it pretty well and after a while I was plowing through the mirror calm Nelson sea with enthusiasm. I even stopped to have a bit of a yarn to Suze. Bad idea. A boat drove behind me and the swell turned my bored into a bar of soap. Squirting out from under me. I hit my arse on the board and slapped backwards into the freezing winter ocean. I wasn't even wearing a wet suit, just my rugby gear.

Freezing I got straight back on and got back into the swing of it. 

We swapped boards on the way back, which was fun. As the tallest, and least confident, I slid along the floating boards like a soggy manatee with a paddle.

The pub after that one was a welcomed respite!

I also went mountain biking in Kaiteriteri today with Mike and Sara from work. It was brilliant. Trudging up Candace's massive hill back home after work has paid off. I was flying up the tracks. I really enjoyed whizz ing up and down though the woods, over little jumps and out on cliff faces with stunning vistas.

I've also moved house. Out of the Donovan's luxury lodge and into a small room in a private block out the back of a hostel in town. It's pretty nice, I've put some photos up on the wall and feel quite at home. My housemate Dave, a chef from Canada, is really really nice and we went out with a couple of other lads for a few games of pool on my first day.

I've been a bit of a recluse though as I've been doing a lot of extra work at a national multi-sport tournament going on over the last fortnight.

Well, aside from a few pub quizzes and judo - I'm getting a bit worse at the former and better at the latter- I'm working a fair bit and just generally enjoying the New Zealand lifestyle, running, cycling and getting in the great outdoors!

Flying with out wings

What a difference a day can make to your whole perception of life!

I've been really down over the last few weeks as I felt, with Jack leaving, I had no friends and am becoming isolated. Don't get me wrong I've met and get on with loads of people. But I've not been able to meet anyone who wants to hang out our of work or organised sporting activities.

Then Sunday rolled round. 

We met up with Jeremy a guy from Judo and went up to Motueka for a helicopter ride!

We got all strapped in, unfortunately jack won rock paper scissors and got the front seat. We got miked up and took off! 

It was really cool, we zoomed around picking up a few g's and got really close to a couple of mountains. We even saw some people dirt biking so we dropped down and the pilot held the chopper near horizontal so we could watch.

After the ride we all decided that packing in our jobs and becoming helicopter pilots was the only sensible thing to do!

We then drove over to tahunanui beach to play frisbee. It was really good fun -except that I still can't throw the bloody thing!- and we went for a beer -or in my case an alcoholic lemonade- after and had a really good time with the other guys in the club.

After the fun of the day Jack and I went home to play the intros game for about an hour!

Golden bay

This weekend after a comfortable win for Nelson Marist Jack and I drove up to golden bay, the northern most point of the South Island.

First we drove to takaka to watch the England v New Zealand rugby match in a small town local pub. We got plenty of stick as New Zealand systematically dismantled the English defence. We also got to see a tubby man in wellingtons fight an old man with one arm. The fun of rural NZ!

After the game we set off in the dark to find somewhere to pitch our tent. We finally found a spot behind a bush at a picnic site. 

Camping outside of a registered camp site is illegal in NZ and each person can be hit with a $200 fine. Imagine our anxiety when no sooner had we set up the tent at around 10:30 a car drives up straight next to ours and points it's headlights straight at our hidden camp spot.we dove into the bushes (something I'm now getting used to!) and waited.

It felt like about three hours, although I'm sure it was only a maximum of 15 minuets but eventually the car left. Probably doggers. So we went to sleep!

We woke early Sunday morning and packed up after enjoying a nice stroll on the beach.

We drove all the way up to farewell spit, a sand spit many miles long, projecting into the Tasman sea. It was very nice. Especially when we got over to the west coast. It was a very wild and rugged landscape. Jack and I commented how it would be a great paintball or quad bike spot. There were armies of small grassy dunes studded uniformly along the beach. These formations were interspersed with quicksand. Completely un definable I would occasionally sink up to my knee and fight for my freedom. 

Then we took a 'short cut' -you know where this is going- it was Jacks idea, for once I wanted to stick to the track. An hour later we were still fighting our way through stiflingly dense vegetation, bogs and small mountains. Eventually we found our way back to the car. Not before I figured it a good idea to army crawl across some dense reeds on a bog, dispersing my weight would stop me getting wet right?

No, 

Lying down on reeds in a bog leads to loosing balance and doing a handstand in pewtred stinking brown water.

Anyway we got back and drove to whariki beach (pronounced freaky beach). 

It was stunning, rugged and desoloute. And there were wild seals and awesome caves everywhere! We mucked around for a bit and climed a huge mountainous dune on the sea front and sat and watched the sea for an hour or two.

We then nipped over to the worst lighthouse ever. A seriously shit automated box we had to climb a mountain to get to before driving back to collingwood wood for a beer, fish and chips and another night in the tent.

Monday we drove straight back to Nelson so I could get to work. Stopping once at the jester cafe, voted best cafe in New Zealand. It was pretty nice, with a rustic Alice in wonderland feel.

Swimming with the fishes!

Friday morning we went out again to fish. This time we went off the warf in Nelson harbour. All was going well when Jack caught a fish!

What the hell do we do with it now?

We had a live fish flipping around the deck! 

I picked him up by the tail to give him a whack on the head, but as I swung up he slipped out of my hand and shot over my shoulder!

It was a right farce!

Eventually I Grasped the little fella hard... And battered his face in against the life boat rescue memorial.

When we had finally delt with freddy the fish a big gust of wind came along and blew our big rig off into the sea.

As Jack had waded out yesterday I had to go get a kayak and paddle out to save it.

I ran to the boat house. Grabbed a kayak. And started down the ramp to launch it.

Slippyest ramp ever! 

I slipped like on a banana skin, just managed to keep myself up but with the momentum of throwing myself and the kayak forwards I started skiing full pelt down the ramp towards the sea. I did all I could do. I leapt as my feet hit the salty water aiming for the kayak I had released into the Tasman. I made it, my legs didn't! Soaking wet I retrieved the rig and paddled back.

By the time I had got back my key, I had left when I started slipping, had been taken. Sopping wet and stinking of fish I had to trudge back through the boathouse to explain myself and plea for my key back.

I got it but my shoes stank so bad I had to work in flip flops later that day as the shoe pong was over powering!

Fishing and pub quiz

Today (Thursday) I finished work early to go to the dentist. After having my filling I met up with Jack and we drove out to Moteka. Via the hunting and fishing shop to pick up some Riggs for our fishing rod. 

We were served by this really nice old boy, who was missing a couple of fingers. He didn't even mock us as we openly said we didn't know how to wind the reel and we had also got the hook on wrong somehow.

We shot out to the Moteka beach to have a go at fishing. After 5 or 6 goes we figured out how to cast off!

With the first real launch... We got the weight stuck in the clay like sand. I sent Jack in! Jack had to wade up to his thighs to go pull our brand new rig out.

We also had trouble with the tide. Mainly that it was going out! So in five minuets of casting the line was in the wash!

Eventually we gave up and had a beer in the car!

We then drove over to do a pub quiz with our Judo team. We did pretty well finishing fourth out of 25. A lady on our team won the raffle and gave Jack and I her prize of a helicopter tour around mount Arthur!

Billy and Babette come to visit!

On Friday after doing a nice trail run from cable bay I came home and waited for the arrival of Billy and Babette. I met the two of them when I was working in Melbourne as a travel agent.

We had a catch up and a couple of beers that evening when I got home from work and watched a movie.

On Saturday they came to watch the rugby match I was physio-ing, we won very comfortably 67 - 7 so they called the game five minuets from time.

After the game we watched the speeches and grabbed some post match food before making our way to the Wakatu for the England game.

I was the worst supporter ever. During the first half when England were smashing it I had all the chat. I even did a lap at half time to rub it in to all the locals. Smug doesn't even cover it!

Then the second half happened... We were the far inferior side. And of course, with each try the all blacks scored, I got a tirade of chat back. Lots of un heartfelt consolations.

After the game we had a few more beers at the Wakatu before moseying over to the sprig and fern for the live band playing. We stopped off at the offie and chined a can of 'big billy maverick' each. It was terrible.

The band were a bit wierd, well their set list was. They had everyone up dancing and then decided to play a nirvana song... Perplexing. But what can you expect from what was clearly a school band.

Later that evening we went to the little rock. The local night club. It was really fun. In under five minuets I'd pissed off a couger.

I went up on the stage for a boogie and this older blond woman came over to me within 5 minuets. Lady: "Let me see your stomach!?"

Me: "Why?"

"I'll show you mine if you show me yours."

"Well this sounds like an illaberate plan for you to get your stomach out and show off, doesn't it?"

"GET YOUR STOMACH OUT,"

"Ok calm down sweet cheeks."

"I'll just get mine out!"

She lifts up her shirt

"WOW, I've never seen a belly button like that before! It looks like an outie wearing a bowler hat!"

"Shut up, don't be mean. It went like that after I had my son, he's four. Your an arse hole."

"Well this is what happens when you get your belly out and thrust it at strangers. People get hurt. Also is that body glitter? Why have you got body glitter on your tummy? I think you do this a lot..."

Lady: "I like you I'm buying you lots of drinks,"

"I'm good ta, I'm pretty pissed at the moment. We just had shots." 

"Excellent, I'm going to get you more drunk then take you home!"

She whips out her debit card.

"Errr, I'm all good cheers,"

What the f**k do you mean your all good! I'm buying you drinks and I am taking you home!"

She tackles me off the stage

"Babette!"

I jump into Babette and we go hide in the crowd till the scary lady goes away.

I think I handled the mater maturely.

We danced a bit more and met some other cool people before getting a cab back with a 1920s style pilot complete with leather flying cap and huge beard!

The next day I wanted to die!

We went down to tahunanui beach and played some frisbee before going home again and veging out.

Billy and Babette left on Monday morning.

Getting back to reality

So living in a luxury lodge in one of the most beautiful places in the world is hardly the 'rat race' but the last two weeks have been fairly un eventful.

I've been working a lot at the sports injuries practice, which is a really fun place to work as I see a good variety of injuries and people.

I invited all my colleagues around for a hot tub party. We had a big BBQ before soaking in the warm massaging waters, under the star strewn sky.

I've also joined a judo club so I can be twice weekly beaten up by teenage girls. I'm not very good but I really enjoy it.

Last weekend after the Nelson game we all went back to the Wakatu pub to watch the England Game. It was a really tight game with England the better team, so I was doleong out the chat. Winding everyone up in a room full of Kiwi's. Only for us to concede a try in the dying moments. Will I ever hear the end of it?!

I then met up with a couple of the guys from work and went out on the piss. It was really good fun doing flaming sambuca shots and all sorts!

Terror!

This morning I met up with Sara from work and her boyfriend Mike.

They took me mountain biking on Richmond hill... I didn't know I had so many muscles on my face that could express terror!

The views were epic but I was just desperate not to kill myself on the verticle drops and cliff faces!

After the fun was over we had a beer in a nice brewery garden and a chat.

We finished just in time for me to go over to the stadium to watch the annual Nelson V Marlborough rugby match which was really good. I sat with all the lads from my team and we had a good time.

I wound up the day by plucking a duck with Heather. One had been shot at the farm the previous day when we were playing with the guns and we needed to prep it for dinner.

So many activities!

Today Jack, Mel (a visiting friend of jacks) and Heather (a temporary farm hand) went up to the Farm owned by the husband of my boss.

Man what a good time! I wish I was a farmer all the time.

We started off driving a dirt bike around the farm throwing big lumps of hay at cows. We took a little spill as Jack took a corner too fast but it was great fun. We then met the girls who had taken the dune buggy out for a bit of a spin as we needed to get to the next farm over.

The terrain was a bit much for us, and as Jack tried to tackle a verticle descent down to a boggy river bed we tumbled again. The girls did their best but the slope was too steep for the buggy and Mel had to get out to save the day!

Before long we had got to the next farm where the old couple who lived there had agreed to take us out horse riding!

My horse was called Mertz, short for Andrew Mhertens the ex All black and Harlequins fly half. apparently Mertz was a bit of a bad boy and they didn't like amatures taking him out as he had been quite a good race horse and sometimes got aggressive with other horses as he hates being overtaken.

I found that horse riding is no where near as easy as I thought it would be! Mertz did exactly whatever he wanted the entire time regardless of what I said or did! Except that is the time I told him to jog on... At this point he started sprinting up the hill! I nearly fell off! I was terrified!

When Mertz fancied it we had a lovley walk along the ridge with breathtaking views all around in the warm sunshine.

Heathers horse was rather taken with Mertz and would get very angry if it's nose was ever more than 5cm from his bum! Sometimes she got a bit too close and Mertz would give a massive shudder, I would hold on for dear life!

On the way back down was when things got really interesting.

Mertz decided to do a 90 degree handbrake turn, which obviously I styled out like a pro... When the instructor lady came to tell him off she went to over take him. He swivled fast and kicked her as hard as he could! Luckily she had got her horse to move so she didn't get hit in the leg but it really was a bone shattering thud into the chest of her smaller horse. Easily enough to kill a man if hit in the chest.

Mertz knew he had been bad so after a bit of darting around he started trotting back nicely to the barn (without saying that obviously heathers horse came too!). Leaving the others in the frey.

After an eventful and very fun trek we said good bye to our horses and headed back to the farm.

Whilst we were on the ridge we had noticed some people setting up a tent on our land. We couldn't resist going over for a few Dorset farmer imitations of "Ger off my land!". When we got there we found out it was the electrician who works on the farms fences from time to time. He had come up for a bit of duck shooting. 

He let us all have a go with his sniper rifle. I hit a shotgun shell from 30 foot with my first shot! Sniper school here I come!

After the shooting I hopped in the dune buggy with Heather. How much fun is a dune buggy! I was razzing it round like a mad man! I beat the farms top speed record with 38kmph, which feels bloody fast on an uneven paddock!

What a great day! We rounded it off with a beer and some wedges at the sleights ale house.

Basil Fawlty's dental practice

What a lovley peice of duck, Crack! 

I didn't really need that tooth anyway.

I quite literally bit the bullet.

We had been eating a duck which had been shot on Alan's farm. With my very first mouth full I bit down on the tender fleshy meat and cracked my back mouler in two on the bullet that killed the duck.

I needed it sorted so I phoned the emergency dentist at 3pm after work on Tuesday. Apparently they had a cancelation so if I could get there now I could be seen right away.

At the end of bridge street I found a small a4 paper with 'Dentist' written on it in a plastic sleeve. With an arrow pointing up an overgrown path between two houses. 

I followed it up.

At the top of the path was a big old house, I colonial style building, dated pleasantly, but not where I was expecting a dentist to be. I entered through the heavy doors. I found myself in a deserted hallway. A small unmanned reception desk at the base of a set of stairs. I stopped here a while before noticing another -this time printed- sign for "am dentist" pointing along the corridor and then another up some stairs. Sufficiently lost in the dated empty building I stumbled into a dentist surgery come waiting room. There was no wall to separate the two so as I filled in my forms and waited for the dentist I could observe the retro dentists surgery.

I was soon beckoned through by the dentist who had a thick accent, maybe Indonesian. She did not have full command of the English language but we got by.

I had her tools in my mouth and an X-ray done before you could say smile. I'd only come to book an appointment!

Rather than discuss the problem she pulled out a huge needle. One with the old fashioned sisor handles you see in the carry on movies. At this point entered the dental nurse. A young South American girl who knew no more than ten words in English. The needle was popped down on my chest while they had a chat.

The needle was picked up and my mouth opened when we had another visitor. Who orders chinease food to a dental surgery... Apparently my dentist. So as the chinease delivery person stood in the corner of the surgery I had a series of anaesthetic injections. As soon as the last one was in the dentist popped up and sorted out her dinner.

The dentist then asked me what type of filling I wanted, silver or white? I don't know I said, whatever you think. But no I had to give an answer so 50/50 I said white. She sucked in through her teeth and said white was nowhere near as good and not really functional for a back mouler. WHY ASK!

Even though it was apparently the wrong choice she continued with it anyway.

Also hilarious was the fact that every time the dentist spoke to me the nurse with questionable English thought she was talking to her and kept trying to answer the questions, this pissed off the dentist. Just like manuel pisses off basil.

The dentist asked the nurse to mix up the white filling mix. On inspection the dentist said that she hadn't made it right and it was too runny. 

For some reason the dentist didn't think I'd heard this and told me that she really didn't think the white option was the way to go. With a mouth full of tampons at this point I was up for anything!

She started drilling MOTHER FRIGGERS THAT HURTS!

Two more doses from the giant needles and third time was the charm. I could still feel a little bit but I decided to just man up. In the end the dentist told me that she was going to use a mercury filling. The dental nurse said that it was ok and got told off again.

Eventually after an hour and a half we were all done I had had a filling.

I met up with Jack who was expecting to go to Judo. With my face still drooping like deputy dawg I decided it wasn't a good idea for me.

Instead we climbed up to the centre of New Zealand for a fantastic view of the city and bay at night  before going I to town for a beer and a few games of pool.

A brush with the law

After work today I had to pick up my new bike I had won in an online auction. To do this I needed to run 8km collect the bike and cycle a further 2km before tackling the monster hill leading to the house.

Easy plan, or so I thought.

It was a crisp evening so I had on a short sleeved jersey, leggings (which were really cheap so don't fit properly, they're pretty much 3/4 lengths and some Hawaiian shorts). I looked a little silly, but hey, I know like five people and it's dark. No one will see me. I go about 50m before I am stopped and heckled by a group of lads from the rugby. Liam, a southafrican guy couldn't believe I was running in such cold weather. He was still struggling having just moved from Africa to get used to these cold nights.

I took my ribbing and pushed through.

I made the 8km easily enough and picked up my new bike, an avanti atomic. I must have gone about 200m before I passed a parked police car. Bells and whistles went on and the car started to drive towards me. I stopped like a good law abiding citizen to see who they were going for. They got closer, stopped and opened their doors. Bollocks. They were coming for me! I had no lights and no helmet on, $100 fine for each.

Screw that I thought jumped back on the bike and screamed off along the bike track in the nearby park. I slammed into the closest bush I could find, bike on the floor I squatted down low. 

After five minuets or so they were gone. I was left to saddle up again and make my way leasurely home!

First week - getting stuck in

My first week of work was good. I co treated a lot of patients with Candace and met a few of the guys from the rugby club I would be working with. 

The clinic is really nice. It has a nice big gym area and a very high end feel. The focus seems to be exactly the focus I have always wanted to work in. Although they do get a lot of acute injuries the focus seems to be on being the link between physio and gym/sports coach. Getting people back to high end sporting performance.

On Wednesday I went for some work drinks in town which was nice and on Saturday I had my first away bus trip. Unfortunatly the Nelson team lost in the dying minuets. But on the ride home there was a sufficient lack of rugby songs so I stood up and cracked one out to excellent effect.

After a few beers the night died off and I went home to the palace.

Landing on my feet

The morning after I arrived in Nelson I got my glad rags on and drove down to the 18,000 seater stadium to physio for the Nelson Marist team.

Soo much strapping!

Two hours of solid taping later I was pitch side in my bum bag following the game. The stands were mainly empty but it was still really cool working at such a nice venue. Candace my future boss came and joined me just before kick off.

After the game Candace and I were joined by Alan, her farming husband and Austin, a very vocal and self assured American guy who was working on the farm with Alan for a while. We had a really nice evening. After a beer at the clubhouse we went back to Alan and Candace's place for some burgers and a few more beers. 

And what a house it is!

A hilltop mansion would be the best way to describe where I am now living. Underfloor heating, ensuite bathrooms and king size beds are the boring bits! 

The huge barn style interior gives way to amazing panoramic views of the bay and distant snow capped mountains across the mirror like blue water.

So I'm pretty happy with where I am.

On the Sunday I went out with Candace to a beautiful waterfront coffee shop and had a chat while enjoying the warm sunshine on this clear peaceful autumn morn. Once we had had our fill of coffee and chocolate brownie we did a bit of shopping and I met up with her husband Alan, Jack (the English guy who will be looking after the farm when Alan and Candace are away), and Austin (a larger than life stereotypical American. Who despite always being right and knowing everything, was quite nice). I borrowed one of their bikes and we went on a huge 4 hour bike ride to the copper mine saddle. We went along ledges with yet more incredible sweeping views. Up and down some very scary troughs and up on the top of the Grampian mountain range. 

The most increadible thing was how peaceful it was up in the mountains. No fog or cload, no whipping wind, just calm serenity.

We finished our ride in the dark as the sun went down on a very good day. With the best eye site in the group I had to lead the way shouting out for obsticles I encountered.

Fare well to a great friend

We finally rolled into Christchurch after our mountain ordeal.

That evening, our last night together Joe and I went to the pub. It was a really good laugh.

We then said our farewells the next morning after getting lost in the Christchurch stupid one way system as we tried to buy some new trainers from rebel sports.

Joe has fast become my best friend and I will miss him a lot. We have had so much fun over the last two months and I really hope Australia goes well for him and maybe we can rent a place when we get back to Brighton.

After a long drive and another bloody speeding ticket I got to Nelson, my base for the next... However long...

Lost on a mountain

It appears I couldn't resist one last hurrah of stupidity before settling down to live for a while.

Joe and I drove half way up the thumb mountain. We were completely surrounded by thick snow. So off we went for a 5km walk through the snow to a hut we were going to spend the night at before hiking back in the morning.

We set off full of jest that this hike was so isolated we were probably going to get lost or snowed, or something of the like! 

We trudged through the snow lightly for a while, following the bright orange markers set out to direct us to the hut. All was going well until we arrived at a wide river which had burst it's banks. Creating a swamp all around and through the hiking track.

I used the skills, that I never in a million years thought I would use, that I learnt in cub scouts. The old three stone manoeuvre. Step on two while moving the back one to the front and continue. After about half hour or so I got to firm land and could direct Joe along the valley wall to a viable track to meet me.

Light started to fade, still we joked about getting stranded in the snow as no one knew we were there.

I don't know if you've ever been in a snowy mountain valley. Light fades bloody fast after the summit eclipses the sun. We followed the river for a while but it quickly became too dark to see the orange guide polls. We followed our noses as well as my compass to no avail.

Things were getting a little tense. Joe started talking about trying to get back to the car. That clearly wasn't an option as we would never be able to find our way through the snow field we had traversed as there were no landmarks aside from 400 meter apart polls which we could not see from more than two meters away.

WAIT!!! What's that! There's someone there! We're saved! 

A blinding bright light had just appeared from over a ridge. So bright Joe and I could hardly look directly at it. Thank goodness, someone must have found our car and known the track wasn't possible to navigate. But what was it? A snow vehicle? A searchlight from a ski field? I started waving my torch at it and shouting.

Joe quickly stopped me by grabbing the tourch. We hadn't booked the night at the hut so if we were caught going there, or camping without a permit it was an instant $200 fine each. While we were discussing our options, the white bright light continued to grow on the horizon.

Ahhhh shit, 

It's the Moon.

Bloody idiots.

After that excitement we decided the best thing to do was to a find a half suitable place to bunk down for the night. After a lot of heated discussion we found a slightly less steep ledge to lie on. Joe used a sheet he had bought and tied it to some grass to stop him slipping down the mountainside.

I found a ton of dead, straw like, grass. I ripped tons out and buit myself a nest. Five layers on top and three on the bottom later I climbed into my sleeping bag under the bright Southern Hemisphere stars. With orian the hunter keeping a watchful eye over us.

On the side of the mountain I listened to the fantastic climax of the Harry Potter audio books. I even managed to steal an hour or two of fragmented sleep.

I peeked out my head at around 1am. My worst fears had materialised. The clear velvet sky had been replaced by dense froeboding cloud cover. Did I make the right decision in making us stay put for the night. Should we have made the risky hike back in the dark. We could have got lost, we could have fallen and hurt ourselves; but we might have made it. Was it not worth a try? If it snowed, as it surly would, we were complety screwed. We would be lost, soaked in minuets and freezing cold, at altitude to boot. After checking on Joe who was pissed off but fine, I decided we would have to stay put. We had made the decision to stay put and the best thing to do was to stick to that plan.

If it started to snow properly we would have to just walk around by the river to keep warm until it was bright enough to see the markers and get back to the car.

We bunkered down again. I think I managed to drop off about half four. To wake up again halfway down the slope. But it was light and the heavens hadn't opened.

We stuffed away our bags and followed our foot prints back to the river, along the bank, up the valley and across the snow field back to the car. 

Back safe and sound!

What where we ever worried about!

We even luckily bumped into a caretaker/groundsman so we didn't get locked on the mountain as he was planning to lock a gate on the road! Although Joe did have to push me and the car out of the snow that had settled under the tyres.